Archive for August, 2010



I always knew my return to Hawaii would be emotional, but I did not expect it would take me so long to process those emotions.  I went to Hawaii in May, and I am still trying to process them.  Some of the emotions are too private to share here, but I feel the need to start expressing them so I can feel like I can move on. 

 The emotions were so powerful.  As my sister said, “It’s like going home.”  It really was like a flashback from the TV show “Lost” which went back to the island in the 1970’s, which is when I lived there.

 In some strange way it was fitting that we went to Hawaii right before “Lost” ended.  It seemed like part of the closure I was looking for.  “Lost” was a way for me to escape reality, as Hawaii is.  Somehow the real world doesn’t measure up to either.

Everything seems easier in Hawaii, which of course is not true.  But I really believe it is a healthier lifestyle…more time outdoors, fresh fruits in your diet, and the importance of ohana, or family.  Of course, the ocean is a big part of it.  But there are beaches everywhere, and deep down I believe that Hawaii really is special.  You have to go there yourself to see what I mean. 

But maybe it’s because I lived there.  I said I could never live there again, but this trip changed my mind.

And I’m not sure I wanted to come back.


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